Blue Goth

Love At First Sight

I have always heard of the phrase, "Love at first sight". I heard of it, and I believed it. I believed it, but have never experienced it... Haha... Some people have all the luck at love, and some don't... Perhaps I happened to be one of the unlucky ones. Who knows? Maybe I am just not blessed with good looks. Maybe I have a face that scares away girls. Who cares? Ultimately, you are the one who care. No one else. I don't know why I started thinking about all this in the first place. Maybe it's because I am now living in an ever-changing environment, where all my friends seems to be getting into boy-girl relationships. Perhaps, the question now is, "Why them, and not me?" Like I said, I am not handsome or anything. I am just some average guy who lives a life of solitude. This brings me back to the phrase, "Love at first sight". Does it truly exist? If I have never experienced it, how can I say that I believe in it? Probably because of one of humans' strong gifts: hope. Hope brings about life. Hope gives us all a sense of looking forward to the future, no matter how bleak it might seem. Well, enough of this hope thingy. The thing is, love cannot be forced. No matter what you do, love chooses people. Not people choose love. Perhaps that is how the phrase love at first sight comes about. Haha... all that crap, all for nothing. I once experienced love in secondary school. I spent 4 years of my life loving a girl, and I know by now that she liked me too. I don't know how to explain it, but I felt something for her. She wasn't all that pretty. In fact, it was her personality that attracted me instead. Her big eyes, cute nose, small mouth... She seem to be smiling everytime I saw her. Always laughing at everything, with that happy-go-lucky nature of hers... I don't what the heck happened, but somebody leaked out that I liked her. Ever since, we avoided one another. We pretended nothing had happened, pretended that we never existed. Now, we have graduated, we no longer are in the same school. I told myself not to give up on her. But in the end, with each passing day, my feelings for her eventually faded, though I was reluctant to... Now? I guess it is over. Well, it might be a great loss, since we used to like each other. On the other hand, perhaps it is good for us this way. There is no point forcing a love when we had never tried communicating with one another. Perhaps, it is a burden that is finally released. Is that true love? If it is, then it hurts. Then again, it may not be. I was still a young and immature teenager then. It was probably infactuation playing its part. Well, whatever it is, it is over. No point regretting over it. Live life as it is, and take what comes to you. I live the rest to fate.

Bourne Hiero

felt a little blue at 6:20 AM,
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